One Way or Another

One way or another, by Friday, May 21, 2010 we will cease to be a family of 3 and become a family of 4 (although really....I think we are close enough you could go ahead and call us a family of 4!). I had my last doctor's appointment today. We are at a solid 3 centimeters. He gave me the option to schedule an induction for Friday, and I took it since it was the absolute best timing we could have asked for given David's off-time situation and the fact that we will not have the benefit of my mother this time. (However, we have many, many awesome friends who have offered to help out in so many ways!!!) My doctor plans for us to arrive at 5:30 am, start pitocin for several hours, and then he will come in and break my water. I am not so sure about the last part. I didn't have my water broken until 9 centimeters with Jessica. After some introspection in the hospital on Mother's Day, I am still planning to avoid an epidural. I realized that the reason I don't want an epidural has nothing to do with fear of needles, wanting "the experience," or feeling the need to prove something. The sole reason I don't want an epidural is because I can't stand sitting still....at all!!!!!!!! I also do not focus terribly well, and it seems like giving birth to your child would be a good time to focus on what you are doing!! As I experience more pain, I tend to go into myself. All other stimuli is blocked out. For someone who has never been able to focus on ANYTHING, that is really amazing. That being said, I always sign the epidural form because you never know how things are going to go. Each labor and delivery is completely different! The thing I keep thinking to encourage myself is: "Well, you had pitocin, broke your tailbone, and had your water broken at 9 cm all without an epidural when you had Jessica. You can do this too!!" If I get in there and decide that I really do want an epidural, I will not be disappointed because let's face it: "Pregnancy, labor, and delivery is not all about me! It's all about the new little life coming into the world!" However, I will gladly accept all forms of encouragement towards my goal of an epidural free delivery....I really think I would feel like someone was putting me in time-out!!!!! :-)